


ADIDAS

by zebraljb



Category: NSYNC
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-09
Updated: 2012-04-09
Packaged: 2017-11-03 08:28:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/379356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zebraljb/pseuds/zebraljb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>JC is accused of being obsessed with sex and music.  As he goes on a trip to find out if that's true, he finds something else along the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	ADIDAS

ADIDAS

“Wow.” JC rolled onto his back, gasping for breath. “That was…yeah.”

“Definitely,” the man next to him said, panting as well. “Jesus…you’re good.”

“I think WE’RE good,” JC replied with a grin. “If memory serves, there were TWO of us involved.” He leaned over the side of the bed and retrieved two bottles of water from the bottom of his nightstand. “Water?”

“Thanks.” The man took a few huge gulps, then sat up. “I may know some tricks, but you…you’re spectacular. Must be because of your focus…you live for this stuff.”

JC choked on his water. “Excuse me?”

“JC…I’ve known you for, what, three months? Your entire life focuses pretty much around two things: music and sex.”

“It does not!” JC protested, sitting up as well.

“I’m not saying it like it’s a BAD thing,” the man protested, holding up a hand. “I’m definitely NOT complaining. You love music. It flows through you. I’ve heard your stuff…you’re incredibly talented. And the sex…” The man shrugged his slender shoulders. “You put one-hundred percent of yourself into it. It’s almost like the music.”

“That doesn’t mean I’m obsessed or anything.”

“Did I use the word obsessed?”

“You don’t HAVE to.”

“JC, you put a song on your album called All Day Long I Dream About Sex. It’s not just a catchy title with you.”

“I just…you act like it’s this major character flaw!” 

“Calm down,” the man said. “Relax. If you were obsessing over something that you weren’t any good at, that would be one thing. But you’re a superb musician, and you’re hot in the sack. You have a drawer full of sex toys and know just how to use them. That’s just like having a studio full of incredible instruments and equipment.”

“It just sounds so…dirty.” JC wrinkled his nose, his normal post-fuck dream state quickly fading into an underlying sense of irritability.

“It is…in a good way,” the man said with a grin. 

“Look, I’m tired. I need to get some sleep.” JC rubbed a hand over his forehead.

“And that’s my cue.” The man got out of JC’s bed and quickly dressed. “You don’t need to be so sensitive about it. I wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings.”

“Isn’t that something that’s important for both sex AND music? Sensitivity?” JC snapped.

“Fuck off, JC.” 

JC jumped as his bedroom door slammed shut.

 

“Oh, hi, Joey,” JC said as he answered his cell the next day.

“God, don’t sound so happy to hear from me,” Joey said. 

“Sorry.”

“What’s wrong now? You’re all sad. You’ve been moping around the house all morning, haven’t you.”

“I haven’t been MOPING,” JC said, although he knew it was EXACTLY what he’d been doing.

“Let me guess. You pulled on a pair of sweats, didn’t bother with a shirt or even socks, and you’ve been in front of the TV, watching true life crime shows and eating cereal.”

JC looked down at his third bowl of Special K and reached for the remote. “I have not.”

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” Joey cooed.

JC rolled his eyes. “Do I obsess over things?” He had to pull the phone away from his head to save his hearing as Joey burst into laughter. 

“Ahem. Oh. Sorry. Come again?”

“Do I obsess over things? Like every day, all the time?”

“Well, when you put it that way…” Joey thought for a moment. “I mean, when you discover something new, you obsess for a few weeks or whatever, then you get bored and move on.”

“No, these are things that I’ve been into for, well, years.”

“What’s going on?”

“Silas told me last night that I live my life for music and sex. They’re all that matter to me and all I’m into.”

“Silas. Oh…is he the skateboarder?”

“Gymnast,” JC corrected. “Evan was the skateboarder.”

“Right. Sorry. I can’t keep your flavors of the month straight.”

“See? If I was obsessed with sex, wouldn’t I be able to stay in a relationship?”

“No. We both know why you haven’t stayed in a relationship, but we’re not talking about that right now,” Joey said. “If you think about it, an obsession with sex would be the EXACT reason you don’t stay in a relationship. You’re looking for the next new and exciting thing. How did this come about, exactly?”

“Well, after we were done…”

“Don’t say it!”

“After we were done,” JC abridged, “Silas mentioned that I live my life for sex and music. That I’m good at them because I focus on ONLY them.”

“You DID write that All Day Long I Dream About Sex song…”

“It was a SONG!” JC almost screamed. “Joey…”

“Sorry. So, this apparently upset you.”

“I want to be MORE than that. I want to be more than a clever lyric, a catchy melody, or a drawer full of sex toys.”

“Did I need to know that? No, Joey, you didn’t need to know that,” Joey said, sighing. “You know you’re more than that, JC.”

“Am I? I’ve been thinking about it all morning, wondering if it’s possible for me to live without sex and music. I haven’t lived without either, for, well, YEARS.”

“That’s up to you, but I see no need for you to go into musical and sexual abstinence just because some limber dumbfuck says you’re obsessed.”

“Thank you, Joey,” JC said, smiling. “You always know the right thing to say. Oh, and by the way? I’ll be coming out to visit you the beginning of next week.”

“What? JC!” Joey squawked, but JC was already hanging up the phone.

 

“While I always love to see you, JC, I’m curious as to why you’re here.” Kelly offered her cheek for him to kiss as Kloey grabbed at his legs.

“I’ve decided, for lack of a better term, to find myself,” JC said, tickling Kloey under the chin and waving at Briahna. 

Joey snorted and Kelly turned to glare at him. “Knock it off. If JC needs to find himself, then we’ll help in any way we can. Exactly where did you get lost, honey?”

“I’d rather not say right now,” JC said, looking at the girls.

Kelly nodded. “Well, let’s get you in that spare bedroom, and we’ll figure out what to have for dinner.”

“Pizza!” Briahna yelled with delight, since they always had pizza when Uncle JC came to visit.

 

“Okay. They’re tucked in,” Kelly said a few hours later, returning to the kitchen after putting the girls to bed. She pulled a bottle of wine from the fridge and opened it, bringing three glasses to the table. After pouring for each of them and sitting down, she looked at JC expectantly.

“This entire thing is ridiculous,” Joey said before JC could even open his mouth. “You’re into what you’re into, there’s nothing wrong with it, nothing illegal. You need to get over it.”

“Well, I hope he hasn’t come here for moral support, Joseph.” Kelly frowned at her husband, then smiled as she looked at JC. “Go ahead.”

“Someone recently told me I’m obsessed with sex and music, that they pretty much rule my life. I’m trying to find out if it’s true.”

“Then you came to the right place, because I don’t think there’s been any sex here since Kloey was born,” Joey said.

“And that will continue if you make any more smartass remarks like that,” Kelly snapped. “JC, you’re a talented man. At least musically, because I really wouldn’t know about the other part. However…I am fully prepared to do an in depth study, if you’d like.” She gave JC a flirtatious smile, and he chuckled. “I’ll write a report and everything.”

“Hey! Kelly!” Joey protested. They ignored him.

“I do surround myself with music. It’s where I feel most comfortable,” JC mused. “And, well, I don’t sleep alone much.”

“Why?” Kelly asked. “I mean, do you feel you need someone there? Do you feel you physically MUST have sex every day?”

“Kelly, you’re beginning to frighten me,” Joey said.

“I watch a lot of daytime TV,” she said with a shrug.

“I don’t feel I physically need someone. Like, I’m not lonely if I sleep alone,” JC said. “And I’ve gone days without sex and lived through it.”

“Days,” Joey said mournfully. “Only DAYS.”

“I’m not quite sure why this upset you so much,” Kelly said slowly.

“See?” Joey said.

“I just…I took a few steps back and see nothing important in my life except music…and, well, sex. I do a lot of both,” JC said. “I know it sounds silly.”

“If it’s bothering you like this, it’s not silly.” Kelly drained her wine glass. “I can’t promise you no music…it’s something we love in this house. But I promise no one in this house will have sex with you.”

“Sounds like a good start,” JC said with a smile.

 

Joey and his family kept JC busy for almost a week. They went to Central Park. They went shopping. JC spent an entire day at the Museum of Modern Art. He’d forgotten how much he loved the swirls of color and daubs of paint on canvas. He even went out to the Cloisters and studied the Medieval art there. He couldn’t avoid music completely; he DID go to two Broadway shows. But it was New York. He couldn’t help it. And he ALMOST managed to keep from rewriting them or changing the arrangements in his head.

“You know what would solve all this,” Joey said as he pushed Kloey in her stroller on JC’s last day in the city. 

“Um, me talking to a therapist?” JC suggested. “Because I know you think I’m crazy.”

“No. I don’t think you’re crazy.” Joey stopped walking and looked at JC. “There is one thing I can think of that you obsess over more than music or sex. And, actually, your obsession with music and sex actually come together in this one thing.”

“Don’t.” JC continued walking.

“He’s single,” Joey said. “He’s sworn off relationships for now.”

“Great. So he’s fucking most of gay California, and you felt the need to point it out to me. Thank you, Joey.”

“JC, he’s my best friend. You’re one of my other best friends.” Joey put a hand on JC’s arm. “How long has it been?”

“I’ve had a thing for Lance since No Strings Attached, Joey, and you know it. But it’s a crush. Nothing more. I’m nothing he’s interested in.”

“Have you asked him?”

JC laughed. “No. I’m not looking for the, “Oh, JC, how sweet. I’m so flattered but we’re better off as friends” speech.”

“You are seriously the second most stubborn man I know,” Joey said, clenching the handles of the stroller in frustration. “Lance would be the first.”

“Thanks for trying to figure me out, Joe.” JC kissed his friend’s cheek. “But I’m out of your hair now. All this family time has helped, but now I need a bit more crazy.”

“And you’re going to the right place,” Joey said, shaking his head.

 

“Glad to see you, man.” Chris hugged JC at the front door. “I have your quarters ready, m’lord.” He led JC out the front door to his battered RV.

“Are you kidding me?” JC stared at the vehicle in disbelief, his duffel falling to the ground.

“Of COURSE I’m kidding you, dude!” Chris’ cackling laughter made JC smile in spite of himself. “I wouldn’t do that to you of all people.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” JC asked as he followed Chris back into the house. 

“I know your ass is too good for my Target sheets in the RV,” Chris said over his shoulder as they went upstairs.

“Jerk,” JC growled, though he knew that of all of them, except possibly Lance, he was the pickiest about things like thread count.

“So.” Chris flopped onto the bed and bounced a bit. “I have our week all planned out. Nothing fun, nothing exciting. Nothing musical or sexual. Just plain boring quality time.”

“What did Joey tell you, Chris?” JC asked suspiciously.

“Well, more than you did, that’s for damn sure.” Chris leaned on one forearm and thought for a moment. “It was something like, ‘Hey, Chris, JC is going through some sort of pre-midlife crisis, he thinks his life is ruled by sex and music, he’s trying to find out if he can survive without both of them, and he’s making his way through his friends trying to do just that. And ha ha, fucker, he picked me first.’ That’s what the email said, anyway.” Chris looked up at JC. “No sex or music? Really?”

“Shut up,” JC whined, sitting down on the bed. “It’s not like THAT. I’m not going through a crisis, and it’s not as crazy as it sounds.”

“So tell me how it really is, then,” Chris said. His dark eyes were serious. JC smiled. He counted on Chris to put some insanity back in his life, but he also remembered how wise and helpful Chris could be when you needed it.

“I’m just wondering if the focus of my life is too narrow,” JC said finally. No need to go into the whole Silas thing.

“Because some dork who backflips for a living said it is?” Chris snorted.

But then again, he forgot that Joey couldn’t keep a secret to save his life. “I’m interested in widening my horizons,” JC said sagely. Chris snorted again.

“Idiot. Let’s go out for Chinese, then get a beer,” Chris said, getting up. “What did you do with Joey?”

“Um, spent time with the family, caught some shows, did some shopping.”

“Well, we will not be doing anything family friendly, we are NOT doing anything that involves performing, and well…you can shop if you want,” Chris decided. 

“Okay,” JC said slowly, wondering if trusting Chris with his free time was a wise idea.

 

He definitely reconsidered that trust when Chris came bursting into his room at seven the next morning. “Rise and shine, beautiful!” Chris shouted, bouncing on JC’s bed.

“Is the sun even up?”

“It is now, Sunshine,” Chris said, batting his eyes at JC.

“Fuck off.” JC pulled the pillow over his head.

Chris yanked it away. “Get up. We’re running. And then we’re going for breakfast. And then we’re coming back here for a bit, and then we’re going skating.”

“Running? Skating?” JC opened one eye.

“Haven’t you noticed my sexy new bod?” Chris got up and slunk around the room, eying JC seductively.

JC HAD noticed when he’d hugged Chris the day before, but the idea of sleeping in the RV had overrun any other thought at the moment. “Wow. You’re like…exercising?”

“I run five miles every morning.” Chris stretched and jogged in place.

“I can’t do that!” JC protested.

“Well, you run as long as you can, drop where you want, and I’ll get you on my way back,” Chris promised.

“Fucker,” JC growled, but pulled himself out of bed.

JC managed to keep up with Chris for the entire five miles, then pulled himself up the stairs to soak in Chris’ luxurious garden tub. It was a secret that Chris savagely hid, but he LOVED large bathtubs where he could rest his tired overdanced knees, and the guest bathtub was no exception. JC filled the tub with bubble bath and hot water, and soaked for over forty minutes, occasionally adding hot water and trying not to think of lyrics.

“Brunch,” Chris said when JC reappeared downstairs.

“No, I’m JC.”

“Cute.” Chris tied his shoes. “We’re going for brunch since you spent the morning in the bathtub, Little Mermaid.”

“I like your tub,” JC said defensively. “And I’m the guest. Don’t I get to do what I want?”

“No. You’re here for me to help you find focus. And you’ll focus where I TELL you to focus.” Chris grabbed his wallet and keys. “Lance is back in LA, you know.”

JC stumbled over a chair. “What?”

“Lance. He’s in Los Angeles. He texted me, wanted to know if I’d be down there any time soon.”

“I don’t care where Lance is,” JC said, then winced. That didn’t sound believable at all.

“The fuck you don’t,” Chris said. “JC, why…”

“No. I’m not discussing Lance with you. How do you even…the only person…Joey told you?” JC ended in a screech.

“I’ve never met anyone who talks in not-sentences the way you do. It’s a gift,” Chris said in admiration. “No, Joey didn’t tell me. I’m not blind, Chasez. I lived in your pocket for how many years? You fell hard for our little Mississippi peach. And I’ve been around the two of you enough since then to see you still carry a pretty big torch for him.” Chris’ eyes lewdly wandered down to JC’s crotch.

“Pervert,” JC said automatically. “He’s my friend. I had a crush.”

“He’s your friend. You HAVE a crush,” Chris corrected. “But that’s right. We’re not talking about music or sex, and Lance is both of those things for you. C’mon. There’s some Eggs Benedict out there calling my name.”

 

“Wow.” JC stood completely still on the ice as Chris literally skated rings around him. “You’re so good.”

“Been skating since I could walk, practically.” Chris skidded to a stop, ice flying. 

“I can’t do this,” JC moaned, taking a few cautious steps and almost landing on his ass.

“Finally! Something I can do that YOU can’t.” Chris did a skating dance of joy.

“Bastard,” JC snapped. “I’m cold. I’m going to get some hot chocolate. You keep doing what you’re doing.”

“You mean this?” Chris put his hands in his pockets and whistled as he skated backwards.

“RAT bastard,” JC amended, and carefully made his way to the side of the rink.

JC smiled as he took off his rented skates and returned them. At least he wasn’t thinking about his issues. He loved seeing Chris truly happy, and he was always happy on the ice. JC tugged on his sneakers and went to the snack bar. Warming his hands around the paper cup of hot chocolate, he wandered over to the other rink, where figure skaters were practicing. He leaned on the Plexiglass, sighing in admiration as a young woman did perfect jumps and leaps, ending in a whirling spin.

“Are you a skater, too?”

JC whirled around to look at a tall man with dark hair and amazing blue eyes. “No,” JC said faintly. “I wish.”

“You have the build for it.” The man looked JC over from head to toe, smiling. “Tall, thin, strong…”

“Dancing,” JC said, shrugging. “I can barely get from one side of the ice to the other without landing on my butt.” He looked at the ice again. “That really is something.”

This time the man shrugged. “It’s like walking for me.” He put down his bag and held out his hand. “I’m sorry. I’m Johnny.”

“JC,” JC said, shaking the outstretched hand.

“So you’re a dancer?”

“I used to be,” JC said. JC studied the man carefully. He looked to be in his mid-twenties. “Now I do some TV work, music production.” It wasn’t EXACTLY a lie.

“That sounds interesting,” Johnny said. JC sipped at his hot chocolate and blushed a little at the intense look Johnny was giving him. “Would you like to…”

“Dammit, JC!” JC rolled his eyes as he heard Chris growl behind him. “I can’t leave you alone for five minutes. I thought we were doing a no music, no sex thing.”

“CHRIS!” JC whined in horror.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Is this your boyfriend?” Johnny asked in confusion.

“No!” JC exclaimed, while Chris said, “Yes. Yes, he is. Aren’t you, baby?” Chris gave JC a smack on the cheek and JC moaned.

“Well, nice to meet you, JC.” Johnny gave him one more confused look and went to the locker room.

“REALLY, CHRIS?” JC yelled, his voice so loud it echoed through the rink.

“Hey, I was helping you! You’re trying to say no to sex. And that guy was sex on two legs. I’m STRAIGHT and I could see that,” Chris said. “I was doing you a favor.”

“I wanted to…” JC sighed. “You’re right. I’m sorry I yelled. I guess I forgot. Maybe Silas was right.” JC frowned. “Sex IS all I think about.”

“I’m sending you to someone else,” Chris said. “You’re too much work.”

 

“Jayce!” Justin said happily, hugging JC as soon as he entered the hotel suite. “Great to see you, man.”

“Good to see you, too,” JC said. His smile froze on his face as he looked over Justin’s shoulder. “Hello, Lynn.”

“JC. It’s been too long.” She hugged him tightly. “You’re so thin.”

“He’s always been thin, Mom.” Justin rolled his eyes. “Mom was just leaving, weren’t you?”

“Are you kicking me out, Justin?” Lynn pretended to pout.

“Of course not.” Justin kissed her cheek. “Just making sure you’re leaving.”

“I feel like you’re fifteen again, wanting me to get out of the house so you can cause trouble.” Lynn found her purse and grabbed a small overnight bag. 

“We won’t cause trouble,” Justin said, his face a mask of innocence.

“Sure you won’t.” Lynn smiled at JC. “Good to see you again, JC.”

“You, too,” he said automatically. He waved as Justin gave her one last kiss and led her to the door. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Lynn, but he just didn’t understand the large part she still played in Justin’s life. Justin was on location, filming in Denver, of all places, and here was Lynn, staying for days in his hotel suite. JC loved his own family, but once he hit adulthood, they moved to a backburner in his life.

“Okay.” Justin returned, smiling at JC. “Let’s cause trouble.”

 

Justin’s idea of trouble was going to a small, elite strip club. While JC knew this didn’t fall under his “no sex” plans, he wasn’t really interested in watching beautiful women take off their clothes. He technically called himself bisexual, if he had to give it a name, but definitely leaned more towards men than women. Not that he couldn’t admire how beautiful the women were…but if he had to choose, he’d rather have the man next to him give him a lap dance than the beautiful redhead writhing against a pole on the stage.

“So.” Justin finished his beer and waved the glass in the air. A waitress came over with a refill almost immediately. “You’re looking to find a life outside music and sex, as well as get over Lance.”

“Jesus fucking Christ.” JC slammed his glass down and glared at him. “That is NOT it at ALL.”

“Aw, c’mon, Jayce,” Justin said cajolingly, the teenager of years ago darting through the pout. “Don’t get mad at me.”

“Who’d you talk to?” JC said wearily, rubbing at his eyes. At least he wasn’t interested in the music here. Strip music was grinding metal to his ears.

“Chris, of course. And then Joey, because can you ever really trust a story the way Chris tells it?” Justin smiled, and JC could only grin back. 

JC studied Justin for a long moment. “Do we REALLY have to discuss this HERE?”

“No. Of course not.” 

 

JC soon found himself sitting in on the cracked seat of a booth in an old diner. The table wobbled on its frail legs, and the waitress seemed to be almost as old as the table. Justin was apparently a regular, though, for the woman actually chucked him under the chin and chided him for not coming in for the last two days. “I had to be at work early,” Justin explained to her. “This is one of my best friends, Jennie…I brought HIM here. Doesn’t that say something?”

“You’re forgiven,” the waitress said with a grin. “What can I get you, honey?”

“Um…” JC studied the menu, his eyes automatically straying to the salads. 

“We both want bacon cheeseburgers and fries,” Justin said, grabbing JC’s menu. “Cokes.”

“Good.” Jennie gave them both a warm smile and tottered off.

“I love places like this,” JC said with a sigh.

“I knew you would.” Justin put an arm along the back of his side of the booth and looked at JC. “You can tell me anything,” he said, and JC knew it was true. They’d grown up and their relationship had changed, but deep down it was made of the same stuff.

“I’ve been seeing this guy, Silas. Everything was good, casual but good, you know? Sex was good, he let me have my space. Then he tells me one day that all my focus is on two things…sex and music. It made me think, so I decided to distract myself. And in the meantime, I got to visit my good friends.” JC shrugged as Jennie brought their drinks. “And everyone keeps saying, “Well, you wrote that song…All Day Long I Dream About Sex.” Like that means anything. I also wrote a song called Space Cowboy. Does that mean I’m fixated on outer space and rodeos?”

Justin blew his straw paper at JC. “I don’t think that’s everything.”

“Why?”

Justin leaned forward, his large hands wrapping around his glass. “JC, I think you’re feeling insecure. He said it’s what you focus on…and you took it to mean it’s all you ARE.”

“I…” JC paused, staring at Justin.

“Music is your passion. I get that. It used to be my passion, too, and then eventually it morphed into acting. That happens.” Justin thought for a moment. “You’re one of the most talented musicians I’ve ever met, JC. That is NOTHING to be ashamed of. As for the sex…you like sex. So what? It’s not all you are. You’re not some horny pervert, luring little boys into your van with the shag carpeting in the back.” Justin raised an eyebrow. “Are you?”

“If I was, I would have tried to lure you in long ago,” JC promised.

“Aw, you say the sweetest things,” Justin cooed.

JC rolled his eyes. “You’re right. I know it’s not all I am. But it just made me feel like I was missing something.”

“You were missing us,” Justin said as Jennie brought their food. “And now you’ve found us again.”

JC sighed as he looked at the huge burger. “You’re killing me here.”

“Speaking of finding us again…” Justin shook ketchup onto his plate and casually smiled at JC. “I’m thinking I was the last one on your list.”

“It’s not that I LIKE you any less, I just knew you were busy, and…”

“That’s not what I meant. You weren’t planning on hooking up with Lance, were you? Or WERE you.” Justin waggled his eyebrows.

“What?” JC said weakly. Did everyone know everything about him?

“You weren’t planning on including him in your little Two Thousand Twelve Finding JC Tour, right?”

“Well…”

“JC. God…Lance has been running around for years now, trying to find the perfect guy for him. Obviously he hasn’t succeeded. Maybe YOU’RE the one!”

“I don’t care who he finds,” JC muttered.

“Liar,” Justin snapped. He looked at JC for a long moment. “I have something to tell you,” he said finally, and JC put down his burger. Justin looked nervous and uncomfortable, something JC didn’t see very often. “Back when I was around eighteen, Lance…Lance and I hooked up. A lot. For about eight months.”

“What?” JC whispered.

Justin didn’t meet JC’s eye. “It was right around the whole lawsuit thing…we ended up talking a lot, and one thing led to another, and. Yeah.”

JC stared at him. “But you’re…you’re not.”

“I know. Which is one of the reasons I’ve never told anyone. No one knows except Lance, and you. It’s not something I’m comfortable talking about. It was great, don’t get me wrong. When Lance gives you his attention, it’s pretty awesome. But it’s not who I am, really, and it didn’t last.” Justin finally met JC’s blue gaze. “The other reason it didn’t last was because his heart wasn’t in it. It was a physical thing for us. He knew we weren’t meant to be…and he was starting to look at someone else.” Justin took a bite of burger and waited.

“Look at…you mean me?”

Justin nodded. “He started to get very interested in you, JC. Then things blew up with No Strings, he had to play it straight, and then, well, life happened.”

“Jesus.” JC looked Justin in the eye. “You’re not lying.”

“I wouldn’t lie to you about this, JC. I know you’re kinda confused or whatever right now, feeling down…I just felt I needed to tell you.”

JC didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what to say. Finally he said, “Well, I appreciate you telling me, I guess.”

“All I will say is you probably have a chance, JC,” Justin said softly.

“Maybe,” JC said, and changed the subject.

 

JC returned to his home in LA needing a vacation from his vacation. He’d enjoyed the time with his friends, but self-interrogation was always tiring. He made sure to send them each a thank you gift, although he was still a little irritated at Chris for interrupting his conversation with the figure skater. JC knew he could have walked away with Johnny’s number, if not an actual date. 

JC threw himself into writing and didn’t feel a bit guilty about it. He actually felt better about his work than he had in months. He’d focused on every part of music BUT writing, because he didn’t feel inspired. But now his work was a little deeper, a little quieter, a little more introspective, and he was proud of it. His friends were right: he WAS good at music, and it was nothing to be ashamed of.

Silas called a few times and JC ignored his messages before finally calling back a week after he was home. “Are you still angry with me?” Silas asked. 

“I had no reason to get angry with you, and I apologize,” JC said. “You really did nothing wrong, and I acted like an idiot.”

“I’m glad we agree on that,” Silas replied, and JC smiled. “So, I was thinking…”

“But I don’t know that we should keep seeing each other,” JC interrupted.

Silas was quiet for a moment, and then said, “Well. Didn’t see that coming.”

“You’re a great guy, Silas. You’re sexy and funny and I have fun with you. But I…think I’m looking for something else. It’s…”

“Please don’t say it’s not me it’s you,” Silas said. 

“We weren’t exactly exclusive, anyway,” JC said softly.

“Doesn’t mean I didn’t want us to be,” Silas replied. “Good bye, JC.”

JC frowned as he stared at the phone in his hand. That could have gone better.

 

JC buried himself in his studio for about two weeks before finally coming up for breath. He realized that maybe Silas had been right in some respects…when he was involved in creating something, it took over every part of his life. JC locked the studio door and went to check his emails. Joey sent him recent pictures of the girls, Chris sent him a few dirty jokes, and Justin sent him an invite to a party one of the studios was throwing in LA the next week. A party. JC could use a party. 

 

“Glad to see you, man!” Justin hugged him. “You look good.”

“Thanks.” JC looked at his purple button-down shirt and black pants. “You said business casual.”

“That IS business casual for this business.”

“That’s what I figured.” JC smiled at Jessica, who was beautifully draped on Justin’s arm. 

“I’m gonna have to mingle, but I’m really glad you came, JC,” Justin said. “I invited Chris and Lance, but Chris isn’t in town, and Lance never responded.”

“I see,” JC said.

Justin looked him in the eye. “CALL him,” he ordered, then drifted off into the crowd with Jessica in tow. JC sighed and went to the bar. 

Two hours later, JC found himself at one of the hotter gay bars in the city. He’d wandered into a group of people he knew at the party, and they decided that the party was getting old, and a club would be better. He loved clubs…loved losing himself in the music and the crowds. Added to that was the fact that he rarely left a club alone. He was tired of being celibate, and looked forward to finding someone at the club. Unfortunately, his stars didn’t seem to be aligned, and no one caught his interest. He excused himself from the group, pleading fatigue, and headed home alone.

JC was home by 1:30, and snoring on his sofa by 2:00, still in his clothes. Around 2:45, something niggled at his sleeping brain, and he tossed and turned a bit, but didn’t awaken. The cellphone he’d forgotten to silence screamed in his ear, causing him to sit up. “Jesus!” He panted, his entire body shaking. He fumbled with the cell, eyes widening as he focused on the screen.

“OPEN UP UR DOOR RITE FKNG NOW.”

JC stumbled to the door and opened it. “Uh, hi, Lance.”

“I’ve been banging on the door for like ten minutes, JC.” Lance glared at him.

“I was, uh, sleeping.” JC waved a hand in the direction of his living room. “Are you all right?”

“Are you going to invite me in?”

“Sure, of course. Sorry.” JC stepped aside and Lance sauntered by him. Still half asleep, JC stared at him in confusion. Lance wore a green short-sleeved shirt and tight black jeans. JC hadn’t seen him in months, and his mouth almost watered. “What…are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine. I just had a question.” Lance crossed his arms over his chest, and JC inwardly whimpered at the way the sleeves of his shirt tightened over his biceps.

“And you needed to ask it right now?” JC slipped by Lance to lean against the wall of the hallway. “Are you drunk?”

“I’ve been drinking,” Lance admitted. “But I’m not drunk.” Lance walked over and leaned one palm against the wall next to JC’s head. “I hear you were on vacation.”

“Yes. I needed to do some thinking so…”

“You went to visit Chris. To do some thinking?” Lance shook his head and grinned. “That makes no sense.”

“I saw Joey first. Then Chris, then Justin.” JC looked up at Lance and willed his heartbeat to slow down. Every time he saw Lance, he felt like a kid with his first crush.

“And you weren’t going to see me?”

“Well, I…you’re…you know, busy, and…”

“Who do you know that’s busier than Justin, JC? And you went to DENVER to see him.” Lance frowned.

“I’m sorry?” JC offered.

“I hear the reason you went on vacation was to sort some things out. Priorities.” Lance leaned the other palm on the opposite side of JC, bringing his face directly in front of him. 

“Great.” JC leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “Now you can make fun of me, too. I got all caught up on the idea that I obsess over music and sex. I know I don’t. I figured it out. I don’t need any kind of intervention.”

“I’m not looking to do an intervention.” Lance’s voice was a purr in his ear, and JC couldn’t open his eyes. “I’m lookin’ to find out exactly why you never called me. Do you think I don’t know anything about music or sex, JC?” 

Lance’s voice had lowered somehow, and the accent thickened as he spoke. “I don’t think that,” JC whispered. “I just…I couldn’t…”

“I talked to Justin.” Lance’s hands slid down the wall to take JC’s fingers in his own. He slowly slid their hands back up until he had JC’s hands pinned under his own against the wall, just above his head. JC definitely wasn’t opening his eyes now. “He said he told you about he and I…what we did.”

“Yes.”

“He said he told you that I was interested in you.”

“Yes,” JC barely whispered.

“He also said that you were interested in me, way back then, and that maybe you still were.”

JC mentally cursed Justin. “Yes,” he admitted.

“Look at me, JC.” Lance’s voice lost some of its predatory growl, and JC’s eyes fluttered open. Lance was looking at him, his teeth worrying his bottom lip a bit. “Was he telling the truth?”

JC flexed his hands and arms a bit, but Lance wouldn’t release him. “Y-yes. I’m sorry, Lance, but…”

“God, why didn’t you ever say anything?” Lance pinned JC’s wrists firmly against the wall and kissed him, hips thrusting against him. JC whimpered as his body sagged, thankful for the strength of the wall behind him. Lance’s kisses were angry and deep, his tongue plundering JC’s mouth. JC moaned, his body arching up to Lance’s. 

“Let me go,” JC begged.

“Never letting you go, you fucking idiot.” Lance pinned JC’s wrists in one hand while his other fisted in JC’s hair. “I cannot believe you never said anything.” 

JC barely had time to gasp in a breath before Lance was kissing him again, the hand briefly tightening in JC’s hair before sliding down his chest. The hand gripped at JC’s hip for a moment, then slid up to slowly unbutton JC’s shirt. JC’s brain briefly fell onto the thought that Lance was way too good at unbuttoning with one hand, then he finally thought to push against Lance’s hold. Lance’s hand fell away, and JC’s hands grabbed at Lance’s shirt. Lance’s body was hard and lean against his, and their hips were soon rolling together. “God…” JC gasped when Lance finally let him up for air. Lance’s mouth slid down to JC’s neck, and JC felt rather than heard him gasp as his fingers found the soft skin at Lance’s waist. “I don’t…I can’t…what?” JC stammered.

Lance smiled against JC’s skin as his hands slid up under JC’s shirt. “I love that I make you forget how to make sentences.” Lance pulled back and looked at him, one finger trailing over a nipple. “I’ve wanted you for years, JC. Been in love with you for years. I never knew you…saw me.”

“Saw you?” JC laughed, letting his head fall back again. “You were all I COULD see for a very long time.” He opened his eyes and looked at Lance. His cheeks were pink, and his lips were that kind of swollen that happens when someone is well-kissed. JC slowly smiled, taking Lance by the waist and turning him around. Lance moaned slightly as his head hit the wall, but JC’s hand was there behind his head, cupping his neck. JC gave his shoulders a shrug, and his shirt fell to the floor.

“Jesus,” Lance said weakly, all aggressiveness gone. JC’s hand slid down to cup between Lance’s legs, his erection hard and straining against the denim. JC kissed him, demanding, hard kisses. His hand stroked Lance through his jeans. Lance’s hands grabbed for JC’s waist, almost as if he was trying to hold himself up.

JC fell to his knees, nuzzling against Lance’s cock through the jeans. He rubbed his cheek against him, feeling himself get even harder as he felt that thickness against his face. Both of Lance’s hands were in his hair now, alternately fisting and petting. As he stood back up, Lance’s hands caressed JC’s bare skin. “Do we really want to continue this here? I have a perfectly good bed upstairs…”

Lance looked over his shoulder at the floor and pretended to consider it. “Well…”

JC grabbed Lance by the neck and kissed him. “Upstairs.”

Lance let out a growl and took JC by the hand, almost yanking him up the steps. 

 

JC woke up wrapped in a warm cocoon of strong arms and soft skin. He sighed, remembering this dream. He would dream about Lance, about the incredible hot sex they could have, all the positions they could try. Then he’d wake up with someone else, remember the fairly good sex he’d just had, and then he’d go to the studio and write about it.

As his eyes fluttered open, however, he realized he was laying in bed, his back against a hard chest, and a very familiar ring was on the hand holding his own. “Um…Lance?” JC murmured.

“Hmmm?” The low rumble against his hair made JC’s entire body jump to attention. “You okay?”

JC slowly rolled over, eyes widening. This time it wasn’t a dream. Everything he remembered, the glorious ache he felt all through his body, that was real. Lance was next to him, eyes closed, hair a mess, arms wrapped around JC. “I’m fine,” JC said softly.

The beautiful eyes flicked open. “Are you sure?” Lance’s voice was full of concern. “I know this was kinda sudden, and maybe we shouldn’t have jumped into bed like this…”

“Are you sorry we did?” JC frowned. “I just…it felt so right. We’ve known each other forever.”

“Shush.” Lance put a finger on JC’s lips. “I’m NOT regretting anything. You’re right. We HAVE known each other forever, and it DOES feel right. I just…I feel like we wasted some time.”

“We wasted a LOT of time,” JC corrected, nipping at Lance’s finger. 

Lance smiled, pulling JC to rest his head on Lance’s chest. JC sighed happily. “So…do you want to explain exactly what happened? The whole finding yourself thing, for lack of a better phrase…”

JC sighed, getting way too used to explaining it. “I was seeing someone, who told me that my life focused on two things and only two things: sex and music. So I kinda went on a mini-vacation, attempting to avoid both those things.”

“And?”

“Well, when I was with Joey, I did avoid sex, but I went to a few shows. I was able to enjoy them as entertainment, though, and not view it as any sort of work. And then I visited Chris, who wore me out with a good time, but also completely cockblocked me.” Lance laughed until he gasped for air. “Then I went to Justin, who took me to a strip club, then to a diner, and eventually shopping…and managed to inform me that the two of you were hot and heavy for a while.”

“We were NOT hot and heavy,” Lance corrected. JC moved so he could see Lance’s face. Lance was blushing. “Justin was too young for me to get hot and heavy with…and, honestly, at that time I was too inexperienced.”

“And then I came home, and did some really good work, for myself and no one else. And then some hot guy showed up at my door, all sexy and aggressive and throwing me up against a wall. What was that all about?”

Lance smiled, raising an eyebrow. “I have a LOT of tricks up my sleeve, JC Chasez. You just wait and see.”

JC poked his stomach. “What made you come over here last night?”

“I made it to that party after you left,” Lance said. “I found out where you were going, ran home and changed, and then went to the club. I saw you…shaking that ass on the dance floor. You were killing me.” It was JC’s turn to blush. “And I finally made up my mind to DO something about the way I’ve felt for so long. Justin told me about how you felt…and Joey told me a few years ago, believe it or not.”

“I believe it,” JC muttered. “That boy cannot keep a secret.”

“Well, I didn’t believe it,” Lance said softly. “I couldn’t believe that you would be that interested in me. And then things happened, and…yeah.”

JC slid up Lance’s body and kissed him for a long time. “Would it bother you if I was obsessed with music and sex?”

“If you weren’t obsessed with music, you wouldn’t be you,” Lance said. “And I wouldn’t love you like I do.” JC couldn’t stop smiling. “And as for the sex…as long as you’re turning that obsession with sex in my direction, then I wouldn’t say a word.”

“Good.” JC did a slow roll against Lance. “Let’s shower, sing a bit while we’re in there, then come back to bed.”

“I like your two-track mind,” Lance said. His hands squeezed at JC’s ass before sliding him to the side so he could sit up.

“And by the way?” JC said. “I love you, too.”

THE END


End file.
